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So, I just started my first day of college today. It was definitely nerve-wrecking for me. The thoughts of meeting new people and being surrounded by other people dreaded me. Since I'm more of an 'indoor' person, it overwhelms me even more. I could barely step out of the car because I was too nervous. To be honest, I was on the verge of crying too. I kept trying to tell people, especially my parents, about the things that I feel but they kept shrugging it off, saying that there is no such thing as social anxiety. I would like to be officially diagnosed, but I can't even go anywhere outside my house without feeling very anxious. Moreover, whenever I think about this stuff, I'd feel nauseous and lightheaded too. I just want to rest and be away from other people.


Also, when I'm out of my house, it feels as like I'm a whole new person that I could barely recognize. I became soft-spoken, extremely cautious of my surroundings, I could barely get a single word out of my mouth. When other people talk to me, I'd either nod or shake my head most of the time, rarely would I reply with another word and when I do reply, it's not that elaborate. From their facial expression, I believe that they don't get what I'm saying at all... :c


I'm tired of being like this. What should I do to improve this situation? I don't want to be useless to other people, especially during teamwork activities. It's just that when I'm out, all these anxiety thoughts started to fill up my head. I couldn't focus on anything at all, because my mind is filled with the thoughts "How do I deal with all these people? What should I say? How should I reply them ? What should I do?" People would think that I'm an airhead or something because I tend to space out a lot and forget about what is happening around me.

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